| Social Anxiety |
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Facing your fears
You are probably aware that avoiding situations where you feel anxious seems like a reasonable solution to your anxiety in the short-term, but in the long-term it means greater limitations in your life. Also, the number of situations you find anxiety-provoking has probably grown as your fear has generalised. In order to overcome your fear of these situations, you will need to gradually face them again.
Step One: Identify goals to work towards:
What are you avoiding because of your social anxiety? Make a list of up to 10 situations you avoid or find difficult because of your social anxiety. What do you fear will happen? Design your program so that it enables you to actually test out some of these things you fear. For example, if you avoid catching the bus because you feel too self-conscious and believe that everyone is looking at you, a task could involve sitting on a seat facing people in the bus and looking up at other people. This may provide you with some evidence against the idea that you are so conspicuous (i.e. everyone is noticing you).
Step Two: Break these goals into steps:
Where possible, try to come up with some steps that are easier than the ultimate goal. These may include different sorts of situations that still present the same concerns.
For example, an ultimate goal might be:
To manage my anxiety when I'm the centre of attention
A series of steps could include:
1. Tell a brief story about something funny or unusual that happened to you recently in front of a couple of people you know
2. Express your true opinion about an issue being discussed with people you know
3. Relate an experience in front of a group of people which includes those you don't know so well
4. Make a brief toast at dinner with a group of people you know
5. Make a toast in front of a group which includes people you don't know
Step 3: Putting it into action.
You may need to practice a particular step a few times before you feel comfortable enough to move on to the next step. Set yourself the task and go through with it even if you feel anxious. Afterwards, think about what you learned from your experience. Did anything bad really happen? If you are still feeling very anxious in the situations, you need to check your negative thinking. You can also use the slow breathing technique to settle some of your anxious symptoms. Remember, not all social situations can be planned - you may need to take advantage of spontaneous encounters - use these opportunities to practice your anxiety management skills, e.g. slow breathing, challenging your negative thoughts.
Adapted from Social Phobia ed. Gavin Andrews MD, UNSW, Jan 03 CRUfAD 2003
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